Yesterday's movie day event began at 3:00 with the arrival of Felicity and Taylor and the long delayed arrival of Laura, Charles, and Carla around five. Felicity, Taylor and I bided our time by playing a round of a King Kong board game inspired by the 1976 version of the movie staring Jeff Bridges and Jessica Lange. Displeasure must be endemic to that release because the board game left me burned out and with a foul taste in my mouth. It was complicated and I don't think I ever figured out how you can even win it.


Seriously, the game made no effort to help us along.


Next the two of them played two rounds of Othello. Yeah, remember Othello? Their gameplay degenerated into a simulated race war, because Othello isn't a very politically correct game. I kept busy writing a script for a motion comic I'm thinking of doing about Charles and Carla. There's no promises that I'll ever turn out a finished product, but I had fun scribbling out the dialogue.


At that point the stragglers arrived and we got down to business with Ernest in the Army, with Felicity and Taylor leaving just before it ended.

	Ernest in the Army First Look Studios, 1998 Comedy, Color Running time 85 minutes Directed by John R. Cherry III Staring Jim Varney, Hayley Tyson, David Müller, Christo Davids, John R. Cherry III, Jeff Pillars, Ivan Lucas My rating:
SYNOPSIS. Ernest P. Worrell (Varney) joins the Army Reserve because his buddy promises him the dream of driving big trucks without the pesky combat that the regular Army has to deal with. At first this works out fine until a devious dictator named Tufuti (Lucas) invades the fictitious Middle Eastern nation of Karifistan, an act that sends Worrell overseas in defense of the beleaguered Karifistani people. MY REVIEW. What can you really expect from Ernest in the Army? It's not exactly high-brow entertainment here, but it was fun for what it's worth. By this point the Ernest character had become tired and played out and it was to be the last of the Ernest movies before Jim Varney's death in 2000. The plot is contrived, the humor not tremendously cutting edge, and the characters were shallow, but it still had its moments. Mostly though was Varney's sheer charm and his infectious goofiness that still shone through in spite of the camp film surrounding him. Be it nostalgia, be it charm, whatever it may be, we all found ourselves remembering Varney's career to some degree or another. While his Ernest movies didn't always hit the mark, Jim Varney succeeded in creating a truly memorable goofball character and seeing him in action one last time in Ernest in the Army is probably the movie's only saving grace. Somehow this movie led to some discussion that led to the BananaPopemobile. It's like a cross between the Wienermobile and the Popemobile, but it's a banana. BananaPopemobile exterior. Click for larger. BananaPopemobile interior. Click for larger. Laura had a few choice things to say about the Pope. I don't think LiveJournal allows for that sort of language without my activating the adult content filter so here's an illustration that nary scratches the surface. BananaPopemobile interior. Click for larger. Speaking of Laura, let's just say that she was inspired by the antics of Ernest P. Worrell. Let's move on, shall we? (Oh lets!)
	King Kong RKO Pictures, 1933 Fantasy, B&W Running time 105 minutes Directed by Merian C. Cooper Staring Fay Wray, Robert Armstrong, Bruce Cabot, Frank Reicher, Sam Hardy, Noble Johnson, Steve Clemente My rating:
SYNOPSIS. Filmmaker and adventurer Carl Denham (Armstrong) sets sail aboard SS Venture for a mysterious island in the South Seas where he hopes to make a movie featuring a rumored beast of terrific proportions. He takes along emaciated actress-to-be Ann Darrow (Wray), who winds up being captured by the inhabitants of Skull Island and offered to their monstrous god Kong, a twenty foot tall gorilla. Denham and his men, including First Mate John Driscoll (Cabot), take chase, rescue Ann, and subdue the beast for transport to New York. There, Denham places the ape on display where it promptly breaks lose, kidnaps Ann again, and scales the Empire State Building where aircraft end the reign of Kong. The movie's message: "It was beauty killed the beast." MY REVIEW. I love this movie. This is simply one of the best. Alas, Laura and Carla didn't seem to think nearly as highly of it as Charles and I did. I see their perspective though. King Kong doesn't always maintain the quickest pace and two of the leads, Ann Darrow and John Driscoll, are frustrating. Darrow, because she keeps falling and fainting (or fainting and falling, a difference) at every turn, showcasing no spine at all, and Driscoll, for being an all-around misogynistic douchebag for most of the film. These two characters could have been portrayed better, possibly to the film's benefit, but this may be a lot of Twenty-First Century thinking. The world of 1933 might have been more fair to Darrow and Driscoll. But that doesn't change the fact about how great I think this movie is, the aforementioned irksome character traits aside. The world of Kong is a lush special effects wonderland. Seventy-seven years on and Willis O'Brien's effects work is still astonishing. The stop-motion models have beautiful fluid motion, the composite shots of models and actors are mostly seamless, and the puppets' characterizations are organic and realistic. There are parts where I find myself staring at the on-screen effects, knowing what's real and what's model, and still being stumped at how certain parts of the image went together. The entire jungle, a lavish miniature built for the Kong model, is beautifully layered and animated. Everything is alive and active even in the small scale. I love Robert Armstrong's cocky portrayal of Denham, a man who talks loud and fast, does whatever he wants, and is accustomed to getting his own way. He reminds me of James Cameron, which helps me even more to visualize the sort of adventures Denham's been on before the Kong expedition. Finally, if I had to pick only three things to mention, it would be the role of Kong as a tragic creature. The first time we see the ape he's presented as a terrifying foe and it's great how it gradually becomes more and more apparent that he's a more-or-less gentle animal who only gets into battles with the island's other inhabitants when he believes that his women offerings are in peril. Kong means no harm, he's just taken in by pretty girls (though what he eventually does with them remains a mystery). Denham's epigram, that "beauty killed the beast," is the story of Kong's tragedy. So I liked it. Not everyone will, and that's good. As Laura said, now she can say she's seen it and can feel more cultured as a result. We also had a discussion about the merits of Citizen Kane (1941) which, like King Kong, is another important film that raises argument over quality. Carla greatly disliked it but Charles and I seem to be of like opinion. Kane is important for the ground it broke in terms of non-linear storytelling, jumping between the past and present, and telling the whole story in flashback as a grand eulogy to Charles Foster Kane's life. In my view, Citizen Kane is one of the first movies that didn't treat the audience like they were idiots who needed to have every little detail spoon fed to them, and to that I give Orson Wells credit where credit is due. It's a visually impressive film, if a little pokey, and should be seen at least once, just to know what all's in it. I'm discussing Citizen Kane because I don't suspect we'll be watching it anytime soon and I've never had a chance to really put down my thoughts about the movie. I enjoyed it but have never thought of it as being one of the best films ever. This is the sort of thing that I always wanted movie days to do: create discussion about the vast body of cinematic works across the world and through history. King Kong and Citizen Kane are two important classics of the past that are generally held in high regard. Do they deserve that regard is another question, and one worth talking about. I've always hoped for more classic films to be included in movie days and try to include them when I can. Laura, still being dismayed by Ann Darrow's lack of feminist appeal, asked about strong female characters in early cinema. I was able to name off a handful like The Passion of Joan of Arc, Pandora's Box, and Ninotchka and missed some extremely good and important ones (movies featuring Kathryn Hepburn and Barbara Stanwyck for starters, and such titles as Piccadilly, Pygmalion, His Girl Friday, All About Eve, The Women, and -- dare I say -- Laura). So there's plenty out there, they just don't tend to be popular movie day choices. Next time I'll pick nothing but films with strong female leads. You know what this entry needs? Another illustration from Laura and here she memorializes the weird Elvis-smirking Apatosaurus from the movie as well as Ann Darrow's unfortunate habit of losing consciousness. Something tells me she won't be seeing this one again. Poor Ann Darrow and her cataplexy. Click for larger. This sauropod caused a row on the Ed Sullivan Show. Also, spellcheck is telling me that "Apatosaurus" is wrong and suggests "Brontosaurus" in its stead. I have just face-palmed myself. Oh! And you'll never guess what I found while cleaning for Shatner Day back in March. I found this disgusting thing. You do remember this stupid thing, right? I can't believe that this thing still exists. I also can't believe that this thing doesn't look a day older than it did three years ago. How revolting is that? Why, it's enough for me to end this entry. Ta!

So I'm eyeballing 3:00 as a start for Saturday shenanigans, be it movies or what.

YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED, CITIZEN